I really do. I’m tired of not being put first, I’m tired of him spending so much time going out with his mother, I’m tired of being ignored.
He hasn’t taken me out anywhere in over a year. He always uses the excuse that it’s my fault, as I’m always not feeling well. But yet, he doesn’t have a problem with me cleaning the house, doing the laundry up and down the stairs, and going grocery shopping. Those things don’t make him think twice and want to help me, but yet it’s my fault we don’t go out.
I just can’t do this anymore. He says he’ll file for divorce, and move out in a couple months, after he gets things in order, including stopping direct deposit on his paycheck into our joint account. He doesn’t care what happens to me. I’m on SSDI. I don’t know how I’m going to survive by myself, but I’ve always been a fighter, so I’ll do my best. Luckily, my son is almost 18, so hopefully he’ll get a job and help his momma out after he graduates high school. Or maybe I can move to Hawaii with my oldest daughter. I don’t know. It’s going to be a day by day basis.
I’ve got a lot of thinking to do, and a lot of figuring out how to survive. At this point, the holidays are going to suck, but they’ve always sucked, so nothing new there. Never thought I’d be alone at my age.